Sunday, July 13, 2008 2:06 PM
results for semester one, 1st year at univeristy.i thought i wouldnt be able to manage a distinction, let alone a high distinction. the following results were unreal. even, i couldnt believe it was so easy to score for the semester. the results were based as a percentage of the whole entire semester, taking into account the tests, projects and the final examination. they didnt release the final marks for the examination but i knew i screwed up on a few papers. the end result, unbelievable.
accounting 100 81 high distinction
economics 100 76 distinction
legal framework 100 71 distinction
marketing 100 71 distinction
marketing really did take me by surprise. the project was really on a low mark, while everyone else scored a better than us. we only managed a 63 % for the marketing group project while i had myself a 70% on the individual assignment. the examination probably i would assume to be a 65%. but a 71% overall, now that is unexpected.
the other one that was surprising was accounting. we almost failed the group business project. a 15/25 while everyone else managed a good mark such as a 17-20 range. we were really disappointed in the marking process and the fact that our business project was only labelled as satisfactory. it was a hefty 40% of that mark that we had risk, pulling our overalls down. the examination on the other hand was either really easy as most who did accounting before in year 11/ 12 or was easy to make up for the strict marking in the project wise.
i ought to be proud of myself. my parents were and my friends are jealous of the results that i get, but yet, i dont even feel a tinge of happiness. i dont know why. it's just results we're mulling over, why the stress about how well you do or not? all that matters is the personal achievement of that person. in my case, i did it and i should be happy about it, but why ain't i feeling any of it? what i have felt for the last few years of study is that i have worked so hard just to make everyone happy but not myself.
when i was young, i desired the attention as the middle child. i have strived so hard to make my parents proud of me and my sisters jealous but in the end i was beat to it. my parents were never as proud of me as compared to my elder sister. if it wasnt for studying, i could have been neglected and left aside, forgotten of my true potential. in the last couple of years, i studied hard for an accpetance into an university, i studied hard so that my parents wouldnt worry about how i would cope in a new study environment, i studied hard for everyone else but me.
next semester it'll be the same and the next few years to come.
i have to learn to work for myself and not for any one else.
i need to take credit for my work and accept the fruits of my labour and,
unless i start to understand that my results are the personal achievement
of my hard work and effort,
i would never understand the true beauty of working hard for myself.
